LINEHAND WATCH
Every Linehand In The Country Identified In One Backyard Wearing Sunnies, Singlet And Teal Tns, Sleep-Ins Booked Clear Through To Christmas
THE BACKYARD — Black singlet. Wraparound sunnies. Teal Tns laced like he's got somewhere to be, and a heavy bag hanging behind him that has not been touched. That is every linehand in the country in one frame, and not one of them can say they've never met him.
The text across the top calls it "easily the cleanest one so far", which is exactly what a linehand says about a pour he hasn't finished and a bag he hasn't hit.
"Look at the stance," said one linehand, who has worn the same sunnies since the barbie in March. "Weight on the back foot, one arm up like he's signalling a truck in. I've worked with that cunt. I've been that cunt."
Industry analysts agree the look is complete: shorts one wash from retirement, sunnies hiding three hours' sleep, and the calm of a man who has finished for the year and hasn't told the boss. A workplace psychologist who has never poured a slab called it 'pre-Christmas posture'.
Sleep-ins are now booked clear through to December, the pump is somebody else's problem, and the bag is still swinging. It hasn't been hit once. Neither has a start time.
Satire, obviously.PumpLife is a satirical publication about the concrete pumping and concrete industry. The stories here are made up for a laugh and are not statements of fact. Any resemblance to a real operator, concreter, pump or smoko is a coincidence.
