G-Rilla Declares Tip Some Dirt And Make Em Squirt A National Announcement After Jumping In The Tipper And Taking His Pants Off Again

G-RILLA HQ — G-Rilla has stood in a hole in the dirt, jumped in the tipper and officially released his newest one-liner to a grateful nation: "Tip some dirt and make them squirt, baby." The crew have confirmed it is the best thing anyone has said on a site this week, which is not hard, because it's Wednesday and everyone is cooked.

"I just made a new one!" G-Rilla announced, moments after tipping the dirt, before admitting he has no idea where this shit comes from. "This pub's in my fuckin' melon!" Nobody on site argued. A shirtless bloke knee-deep in a trench laughed so hard he nearly lost the shovel, while a mate in the mini excavator sat there with his arms folded, like a man who has heard it forty times and still has to pretend.

The gang then ran through a full programme: twelve years of laying the grey gold, a three-pump dump, a long and furious inquiry into why half a kilo of beach sand ends up around your nuts no matter how far from the shore you swim, and a hard-earned lesson that you always get in trouble when you take your fuckin' pants off. G-Rilla's response to all of it was "I ain't stressin' right now."

He also promised that whoever sends in the best one over the next two or three weeks gets a free shirt, hoodie, stickers and a G-Rila dildo. Check @grilla_concreting for how to enter.

At press time, the dirt had been tipped, nobody had squirted anything but sweat, and the whole Gorilla Gang was still waiting for knock-off.

Editor's Note: Satire, obviously.