In what experts are calling “the most cooked shift since Jesus laid the first slab,” a local concrete pumping crew has survived a workday so long it technically qualifies as a mini-series.
The boys were up at the factory at 2am — not because they’re motivated, but because concrete doesn’t care about Christmas, sleep, or the human condition. This was job number two for the day. A casual warm-up before reality fully collapsed.
By 3pm, they finally arrived on site. Concrete was already there. Naturally. Waiting. Judging them.
Then came the setup: 100 metres of line, because apparently the builder had a personal vendetta against pump operators and common sense. To make matters worse, the builder also refused to let them blow the line out — a decision that would later be investigated by historians as the exact moment everything went to shit.
What followed was a two-hour gap between trucks, which in concrete time is roughly equivalent to leaving milk in the sun and coming back surprised it’s cheese.
Back at the factory, the boss did the right thing and rang the boys.
“Want us to come up and give you a hand?”
The lads, operating purely on pride, fumes, and delusion, said no.
Moments later, a video arrived.
The concrete was going stiff.
Not “a bit firm.”
Not “starting to go.”
We’re talking Roman ruins.
This shit had tenure.
That’s when the boss jumped in the truck with another worker and absolutely hammered up there, arriving to find a line that had fully committed to its new identity as geological formation.
What followed was described as “a bit of fun,” which in construction language means swearing, sweating, bargaining with God, and using tools in ways they were never designed for.
Miraculously, everything was saved.
No line lost.
No pump dead.
Only a few souls slightly damaged.
They rolled back into the factory at 11pm, physically present but spiritually unavailable — only to be reminded they’d be back there again at 2am to do it all over again.
Because that’s concrete.
Because that’s Christmas.
Because that’s the job.
Industry insiders confirm the Christmas rush is real, concrete is undefeated, and sleep remains a theoretical concept.